FEBRUARY 12 "DUMB & DUMBER III"

Ohtaj Makhmudov was a 45-year old MAN enjoying a day out at the Kiev Zoo in 2006 when he felt a sudden compulsion to remove his shoes and socks, and lower himself via rope into the lion pit. The unhappy lions were all, like, “psh, whatever” at the sight of him, Ohtaj approached the animals, began waving his arms around, and according to eyewitnesses, shouted “Because God loves me, the lions will not harm me!” It would appear that, sadly, God did not love this show-off and who could blame him? Ohtaj died instantly after one of the zoo’s lionesses, Veronica, seized his throat and crushed his carotid artery, leaving ten puncture wounds in the deceased’s neck. 

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